Feuds sometimes occur in our Christian churches and there was a feud in the city of Philippi that the apostle Paul addressed in his letter to the Philippians.
“I urge Euodia and I urge Syntyche to live in harmony in the Lord. Indeed, true companion, I ask you also to help these women who have shared my struggle in the cause of the gospel, together with Clement also and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life” (Philippians 4:2–3, NASB).[1]
Euodia and Syntyche were Christian women that actively did ministry in the church. But we don’t know what the issue was between these two ladies.
In other places in the New Testament the apostle Paul was not afraid to tell people they were wrong. Paul publicly confronted and corrected Peter in Galatians and Paul condemned a man sleeping with his mother-in-law in Corinthians. Paul probably knew what the issue was between these two women, but it was not important enough for him to mention it or correct a wrong position.
Sometimes our personalities cause conflict with other Christians. For these people living in Philippi, they lived in an important city. Philippi was given the title of Ius Italicum. The people living there were Roman citizens, had voting privileges, and they were governed by their own senate and legislature. They were proud of their city, their ties to Rome, to follow Roman law, and proud of their Roman customs. I wonder if that same pride for the city had seeped into the church and was likely part of the quarrels between these two women.
SEEKING HARMONY
So Paul tells them in effect, Whatever it is, live in harmony with the Lord. Whatever it is, take care of it. He’s telling them not to let their pride get in the way of the harmony they should have as believers.
This is a strong prompting. There is no suggestion here or if you can, please do this. This is a command from Paul to these two women to resolve their disagreements. In the Greek text Paul puts their name first for emphasis. Literally, “Euodia I urge and Syntyche I urge.” Sometimes writers in Greek do this to emphasize certain parts of the sentence. Here Paul is emphasizing their names as the ones responsible to solve the solution.
There are two options for seeking harmony in a Christian family feud: Release it or resolve it. In church sometimes you release it. Meaning you concede your want or need and allow the other person to get his or her way. Another option is to resolve it where you and the person each come to a mutual agreement on the issue. This one takes more time and effort, but is necessary on important matters.
But Sometimes there are issues that we cannot resolve without outside help. And that is what Paul reveals next.
SEEKING HELP FOR HARMONY
Paul calls in help for these two women in this passage asking for help from a “true companion” (v. 3). Paul asks for him to help these two women resolve their conflict.
This true companion might be Epaphroditus, the man carrying this letter from Paul back to Philippi. It might be the bishop overseeing all the church in Philippi. It might have been a faithful, well-known leader that everyone would recognize when he was addressed this way. Whoever it was, Paul asks for his help. Sometimes we need help to achieve harmony. This person likely knows these two ladies and can help them. In our lives, sometimes we need help to resolve conflicts. Dads, moms, brothers, sisters, coworkers, counselors, all can be those third parties that help us resolve our conflicts.
These verses remind us that feuds sometimes occur in God’s family. But when they occur we must learn to put our personalities aside and seek to solve the conflict either by releasing it or resolving it. And if necessary, we might need to include someone else to help us.
[1] Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible, Copyright The Lockman Foundation 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995. Used by permission.